I Spy...

1/22/2019

Daily Literary Quote
"Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes they forgive them."
- Oscar Wilde

Journal Prompt
To what extent do parents have the right to "spy" or check up on their children? What circumstance might allow or prevent this?

53 Comments

Aimee

1/22/2019 10:04:46 am

I think parents should respect their children’s choices and actions once they reach a certain age. When kids are young they need someone to teach them what to do but at a certain point parents need to leave their kids to make their own choices. Parents can spy on their kids however and whenever they want, it just depends on how much effort they want to expend.

Nate

1/22/2019 10:05:28 am

Correct, Aimee

Jennifer

1/22/2019 10:06:23 am

Such a good response. Love it.

Nate

1/22/2019 10:04:54 am

They can “spy” when kids are in their teens but eventually the parent has to trust that they’ve have taught their kid how to be smart in the world and trust them. The kid also has to be trustworthy. If they’re idiots then they deserve to be watched carefully

Nick

1/22/2019 10:06:45 am

Nice response Nate.

Jennifer

1/22/2019 10:07:06 am

Yeah Nate so don’t be and idiot. Make good choices.

Aimee

1/22/2019 10:07:15 am

I hope my kids are idiots so that I can spy on them and laugh.

Nate

1/22/2019 10:07:46 am

I’m sure your parents wished the same

Jennifer

1/22/2019 10:07:51 am

Stalker level 100.

Will

1/22/2019 10:07:46 am

I agree

Robyn

1/22/2019 10:08:06 am

I feel like parents are awful “spy’s” though so they just end up in your doorway trying to find out what you’re talking about and it’s weird.

Robyn

1/22/2019 10:04:59 am

I think that while your child is younger, it’s more acceptable to check up on them more often, but as they get older, you should allow them more privacy. You should still check up on them, but it shouldn’t be you texting or walking up to your child’s room every 15 minutes.

Katelyn

1/22/2019 10:06:25 am

Their children are still people, and people usually need space.

Nutt

1/22/2019 10:06:58 am

I also believe it is good and responsible to have your teen check in with you every now and then but outright spying on your teen shouldn’t be a thing.

Sarah

1/22/2019 10:07:06 am

I agree that as they get older they should have more privacy

Nutt

1/22/2019 10:05:06 am

I feel like parents have no right to spy. My parents never spy on me cause they have always trusted me. If I do something that could cause danger to myself or does I learn my lesson and don’t do it again. I don’t believe there is an extent as well.

Katelyn

1/22/2019 10:05:15 am

If their suspicion is strong where it affects the family dynamic, then it’s fair to want to know if they’re up to something. I don’t think a parent should go as far as reading anything personal that their children write because they destroy their trust. A parent should be more open towards their children and get them to talk and earn their trust first.

Brenna

1/22/2019 10:09:59 am

I agree that it’s important to gain trust first.

Robyn

1/22/2019 10:12:21 am

Yeah I think if a parent took the time and effort to let their child trust them they wouldn’t really need to spy

Sarah

1/22/2019 10:05:22 am

I think they should be able to call and occasionally check where you are and look at the messages that come up on your phone screen or glance over your shoulder at who your talking to. I don’t think they should follow you around town or search through your phone, computer, bedroom under regular bases. If they have suspicions about something I think they should be able to check on it to keep you safe and make sure your not doing anything your not supposed to.

Cherish

1/22/2019 10:07:02 am

Personally, I do not like when my parents look at who I’m texting or talking to. It’s none of their business. I don’t look at their phones.

Sarah

1/22/2019 10:10:06 am

I don’t like it either but sometimes it’s their way of making sure we aren’t talking to someone or doing something we aren’t supposed to. And I’m not saying they should go through your phone all the time but if they glance over your shoulder really quick to make sure you aren’t talking about or planning something you aren’t supposed to I think that’s ok.

Katelyn

1/22/2019 10:07:22 am

Those are good boundaries, and something we can relate to.

Brenna

1/22/2019 10:11:56 am

I think the child should just be honest with the parents and tell them where they’re at.

Kayla

1/22/2019 10:13:23 am

Do your parents show you who they are texting? My dad personally will hide it so why should I show him if he won’t show me

Cherish

1/22/2019 10:05:32 am

I think the only time a parent should “spy” on their children is if they are doing something wrong. Other than that, I feel like a parent should let their child do what they please, they need to learn what’s right versus wrong somehow. I think that if a child lies to their parent on where they are or what they are doing then the parent had every right to check up on them.

Kayla

1/22/2019 10:11:29 am

Very true

Brenna

1/22/2019 10:05:38 am

I think parents can spy on their children if they suspect seomthing may be wrong but I don’t think a parent needs to know everything about their child’s life. They’re are things that a parents doesn’t need to know. Depending on how the relationship is between the child and the parents they may not have to spy on them.

Cherish

1/22/2019 10:07:44 am

I agree. If something is wrong then they can “spy” but other than that it’s not their life.

Nick Heble

1/22/2019 10:05:45 am

Parents have the right to check up on their kids but we all deserve our own privacy without parents going through your stuff.

Jennifer Auwen

1/22/2019 10:05:51 am

I don’t believe parents should “spy” on their children unless they may be caught up in something dangerous. If parents and children could build up a trusting relationship to avoid secrets rather than spying it would probably be better for everyone. If you don’t let your kids make mistakes they will never learn, and if you’re always spying they will continue to keep secrets and do things behind your back.

Nick

1/22/2019 10:07:39 am

Well put.

Brook

1/22/2019 10:07:58 am

True

Aimee

1/22/2019 10:08:12 am

I don’t think most kids have such an open relationship like you and you mom.

Jennifer

1/22/2019 10:09:17 am

LOLLL. Just because my mom knows all of your dirty secrets doesn’t mean you need to get jealous😉

Kiana Farnworth

1/22/2019 10:09:14 am

I agree 100%.

Aimee

1/22/2019 10:09:53 am

Poor Tiff.

Hailey Jo

1/22/2019 10:12:09 am

AGREED

Brook

1/22/2019 10:05:58 am

Parents have the right to “spy” and tell them what they can and can’t do when their young, but when their 18 or moved out then it’s not their business what their doing and not their right to spy or tell them what they can and can’t do.

Brandon Westfall

1/22/2019 10:06:09 am

A parent can go through their child’s phone. They can spy on their children if they have reason to believe that they are doing something they shouldn’t be doing. They shouldn’t go through their kids phone randomly because their needs to be a level of trust between them.

Kayla

1/22/2019 10:10:54 am

How do you build trust between a kid and parents if the parent is always doubting the kid

Connor

1/22/2019 10:06:46 am

I thh8nk parent do have the right to. But they shouldn’t because it’s unnecessary you should be able to trust your kids or just be cool and don’t spy on them.

Kiana Farnworth

1/22/2019 10:07:26 am

I personally don’t believe that spying on your children is the proper way to build a relationship. If a parent gives their child respect, privacy and trust they are more likely to to receive the same in the form of honestly and communication. If after giving your child the freedom of honesty and communication without judgement, they still lie and hide important matters then you may need to resort to such tactics, particularly if your child’s actions are harmful to themselves or others.

Hailey Jo

1/22/2019 10:13:16 am

I couldn’t agree more with this!

Will

1/22/2019 10:07:30 am

Parents need to let their kids make their own choices and decisions when they become a teen. The parents need to trust their kid to make the right choice.

Nutt

1/22/2019 10:09:25 am

Yeah, it’s a part of growing u to me. Parents can’t constantly watch or spy on their child to ensure they make the right choice. If we make the wrong choice then we learn from it for future events.

Joe

1/22/2019 10:08:05 am

Parents can do as they please in that area until the kid is 18 but it might not do the kid any favors.

James

1/22/2019 10:08:20 am

Parents have the right to do whatever they want as long as the child lives under their roof. When the child gets older, they should only “spy” when there is a reason to.

Connor

1/22/2019 10:13:13 am

Fascinating

Kayla

1/22/2019 10:08:45 am

I don’t think parents have much of a right. Yes if the kid is doing something wrong or lying but that’s about it. Especially if their “child” is a teenager. Yes the parent can call or text their kid because they can but not 24/7. Kids need to learn and grow. They will never learn from their mistakes if they are never given the chance to make them.

Saymen

1/22/2019 10:08:59 am

I think parents have the right to check on there kids because they are the one who take care of them in hard times and comfort them. But parents sometimes need to know when to back off too.

Hailey Jo

1/22/2019 10:11:37 am

I don’t like parents should “spy” on their kids unless they are putting themselves or others in danger. Parents should respect their kid’s privacy. Different ages, this is different because younger kids might need a little more guidance and a parent over their shoulder making sure they are doing the right thing but there comes a time parents need to not “spy” and back off so their kids can learn on their own.

Kiana Farnworth

1/22/2019 10:13:30 am

I agree, it’s hard to grow when your every judgement is being watched and critiqued.

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