Can We Still Be Friends? (Kennedi)

4/20/2025

Recently I have had a few interactions, discussions, and arguments about political and religious beliefs. A handful of my friends share very relatively views as me and we do like to talk about it. Sometimes I get frustrated with others when they aren’t even there. Sometimes I feel wrong even talking about it with those who agree with me. However talking with those who do not agree can also aggravate me as well. A couple weekends back some other friends of mine engaged in a topic relating to politics. Though first starting out as friendly banter, things quickly changed and an argument ensued. After about a half hour of this, we moved on to a different topic. I left home early, not because I was necessarily upset, but just drained. One of the friends I was with called me about five minutes later and asked how I could be such close friends with people who had different ideas and beliefs than me. Not that it was wrong, but the fact that in the group, I was the only debating for what I saw right/correct (3 v. 1). I told them that it’s okay to disagree and also admit that sometimes we are wrong. We have to listen and understand, not just speak your side and refuse to even try to understand the other. I love all my friends so much and would not end our friendship on this argument. Now this begs another question, what about romantic relationships? Should we be in 100% alignment with our partner? I have had many adults tell me that it is smart to marry someone who has relatively the same beliefs and views as myself. However what if you really love someone and cannot agree with them? In this day and age, it is easy to start relationships based on physical levels and more lighter or comical interactions. We spend much of our time on social media, connecting through experiences, jokes, and art. In a small town we connect with people and have deeper relationships with people you would never expect to. Do our personal opinions have to make or break that relationship? Maybe the friendship also has to be undone if we can’t agree.

Im not asking for you to tell us necessarily what you believe when it comes to these tough topics, but what do you think can exist (relationship, friendship, sibling, etc.) if you don’t agree.

16 Comments

Brylee

4/20/2025 06:31:26 pm

I feel like you absolutely need to surround yourself with both people who have similar beliefs but also those who don't. This is because I feel like it helps us understand both sides and evolve our own mindset even more. Now when it comes to a partner, I'm not sure because I would want someone who would challenge me to think in more ways and consider different points of views, kinda like being my reason or vise versa, but if we had completely different views then I don't know if we would last or if we would just avoid that part of ourselves to get along. In the end I think have some difference in believes is key to a healthy relationship but you have to have some of the same core beliefs or have the ability to understand their beliefs and accept them.

Mariah

4/20/2025 08:02:41 pm

I agree, we should surround ourselves with people who think differently form us, but we also need to make sure we don't shoot down their opinions or ideas the second they are different from our own and we shouldn't criticize people for the things they believe, unless its truly, truly, bad.

Deanda Lamping

4/20/2025 08:24:55 pm

I agree, I think you and I have a very similar outlook on this. Very well written too.

Megan Aiello

4/20/2025 08:44:34 pm

I also agree with this because it shows how you can be open minded and understand both sides.

Nicolas Sessions

4/21/2025 09:19:53 pm

That's a valid point Brylee about allowing both views in your life to get a better view of each.

Mariah

4/20/2025 08:01:34 pm

Because Salmon is such a small town with very little diversity in political views, it is hard to keep an open mind and thoughts to politics because we are so surrounded by one specific view. I think it is important to expand our ideas and in order to do that, you need to surround yourself with people who think differently than you. So yes, I think we should be friends with people with other political views, but we can't let it get in the way of forming strong boundaries and relationships. I think it's important to have healthy discussions but make sure that we keep an open mind to what the other person is saying and acknowledge that maybe you don't have the only correct viewpoint. I think in a relationship, you should find someone who will support you and your opinions, but its okay if they differ a little bit from each other.

Deanda Lamping

4/20/2025 08:26:54 pm

I agree with your statement. Especially with the point of having healthy boundaries but not to where it stops us from creating and keeping friendships.

Deanda Lamping

4/20/2025 08:08:00 pm

I have many friends/family members that believe in different things than I do. I have found difficulty in speaking out on my beliefs because I have never wanted to be the "cause of a fight." I realize now though, I want to be more vocal about the things I find necessary. I think it is totally ok to be surrounded by people who have a different outlooks on things, but the core of everything should be an understanding of some sorts. My friends and I differ in many ways but we have always meet each other half way. We believe that as long as we talk something through and be able to see both points of view then we can all go home knowing that we got our opinions shared and heard. I know many people struggle with this concept but I never think an opinion should be made more important than another. Knowing that two different sides can come together and find a common ground is where a healthy balance starts. In relationships, romantic and platonic, all voices should be heard and it's ok that not everyone likes that side, because if everyone agreed then the world wouldn't be as diverse as it is. I believe that the only reason people choose conflict when expressing ideas is because they won't open their minds to BOTH sides. Relationships should differ, thats how we complete each other, but never to the point where we hide certain parts of ourselves from others. Everything depends on how you let the two, opinion and relationship, combine.

Megan Aiello

4/20/2025 08:46:26 pm

I also agree that both opinions should be heard and communicated through.

Megan Aiello

4/20/2025 08:42:37 pm

Sometimes I struggle relating to some people or even my family about topics of beliefs and politics. I think the best thing to navigate the differences is to always respect others opinions and ideas even though myself or other may not agree, but showing that you are listening and understanding their views is important for personal understanding and easy communication. As for a relationship, I think it would be best if I had the same views as them so that way we are completely understood but then again, it depends on the person and their opinions.

Nicolas Sessions

4/21/2025 09:25:56 pm

I totally agree respect is key in healthy relationships.

Emylee Perkins

4/22/2025 11:51:10 am

It can definitely be hard to distinguish where you should draw the line and protect your beliefs, and when you need to make sure your mind is open. My family and I can have troubles with this sometimes, especially when it's a disagreement between kids and adults. I think that it is always important to understand the authority and other dynamics between you and the person you are talking with.

Nicolas Sessions

4/21/2025 10:13:24 pm

There will always be things that people won't agree on, even friends. If we let these differing opinions ruin a friendship then we sure would be foolish. I don't think that differing opinions should govern if people remain friends. I also must address the difficulties of being the only one to think one way especially when others make you feel bad for it. That is an issue that needs to be fixed. We need to be respectful in all disagreements. People shouldn't feel attacked for their views. Sometimes when I'm in a setting where I think differently and I get shut down by others I find myself drawing away for a time. It is rough to differentiate from everyone else especially when they make it clear they don't agree with you. Trying to change someone is also not the way to do things. The only thing you can do is explain your feelings, if they change their beliefs it will be on their own accord. Respect, kindness and prioritizing friendship is the best way to avoid ruining a friendship over differing opinions.

Emylee Perkins

4/22/2025 11:48:01 am

I completely agree with you that it is not productive to make anyone feel bad about themselves. Everyone makes mistakes, however, so it is impossible to completely avoid all of the time. I think that even if people need some space to calm down and think rationally, it is important to make amends with those you love.

Emylee Perkins

4/22/2025 11:46:18 am

I personally believe that any type of relationship can exist as long as the degree of insistence for either side doesn't get in the way. For example, I like to think that I can get along with pretty much anyone because I genuinely like to put almost anything aside, no matter how big the problem is (unless it's insane or something.) However, if I am talking to someone about a belief of mine and they believe that it is important to change mine for whatever reason (usually, I'd hope, out of good intentions and love for me) sometimes I find that they start to get angry, or I do. I think that this happens a lot with religion and similar topics. Bottom line is that if one person is more assertive than the other, I find that with my personality they tend to get distant from me. I'll pretty much accept people no matter what, unless they're actively harming other people.

Josie Larsen

5/28/2025 05:56:32 pm

Personally, I think it is a good thing to have different views. It is very interesting to see why they see things like that and how their views could relate or differ from mine.

Can We Still Be Friends? (Kennedi)

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